-56.8 pounds!

Down 56.8 pounds! I can round that up to 57, right? I was really good yesterday (Super Bowl Sunday) despite being at the satellite betting station, which was at the Super Bowl party in the casino I work at. I was literally sitting at a table facing all the free food for about 5 hours. I resisted all the burgers and pulled pork sandwiches and onion rings and chicken fingers and stuck with carrot and celery sticks, some ranch dressing, and some cheese cubes. Had some popcorn too, and a few bites of my boss’s homemade cheesecake. I ended up getting a terrible stomachache afterward so I didn’t eat dinner and that probably contributed to the 2.5 pound weight loss I had this week.

Being less fat is really the greatest thing. When I stay at my sister’s place, she gives me a tiny little towel instead of a huge bath towel like I’m used to but I’ve been amazed the last few times because the towel actually WRAPS ALL THE WAY AROUND ME NOW. And I fit into booths at restaurants way better now, especially the Mexican place I like to get breakfast burritos from. It was a really tight fit 57 pounds ago. I’m still pretty fat (still in size 22 pants, 2x tops) but it is soooo nice to be down all that weight. The best part is when people notice I’ve lost weight. I was dying for someone to finally notice and in the last few weeks 4 different people have said something to me about it. BEST FEELING EVER. I really didn’t mean for this blog to turn into a weight loss blog because that is BOOOORING but I cannot stress enough how good losing weight feels.

I am tired despite taking a two hour nap today. I napped and did my taxes, am I totally productive or what?

Let It Go

I haven’t seen Frozen (but I SHOULD) but the song Let It Go popped up on my favourite Pandora station and now I can’t stop listening to it. I really love Spotify, I can listen to whatever the hell I want without buying/pirating it. I’m pretty lazy so any time I can get something instantly I’m all for it.

Down 4 more pounds! I’m behind on my 75 pounds lost before the end of the year goal but I’m okay with that. I continually make bad decisions regarding food (not necessarily what I eat, just being dumb and only eating twice a day and/or not eating for like 16 hours straight) so I’m not surprised I haven’t lost more. I am not a smart woman sometimes.

My throat is insanely itchy lately (allergies, I think) and I’m currently sucking on some glacier mint flavoured Ricolas. They’re much better and less menthol-y than the other ones I have but they have this weird liquid center that is unpleasant. At least my throat is not as itchy? I was up for ages last night because I couldn’t stop coughing. Even a humidifier is not helping me. I guess that’s my punishment for making out with someone outside for a few hours. However… I REGRET NOTHING. I really want to go into more details about that but I won’t because what if he found this and realized that I am a crazy person? I try to contain the crazy until I’ve seduced them and it’s too late and they’re stuck with me. I’M KIDDING. Mostly.

I am in love with New Girl. I want to be Zooey Deschanel. I want her hair. I want her clothes. I want her adorable quirkiness.

I just ate like six pounds of sugar which might explain why none of this makes sense. I made today a cheat day because I’m sort of emotional today and I really just want to eat my emotions. I’m that kind of girl.

I’m gonna go watch some more New Girl and try not to eat any more Oreos.

Bonus picture of me in a UFO! Who knew that losing 55 pounds would make me not hate the way I look in pictures?

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Happy Holidays!

I’m alive! Christmas was good. I spent the weekend at my sister’s and we baked a lot and did some shopping. I got a pineapple slicer for Christmas and that was the best present. I eat a lot of pineapple. I also got a purple sweater (in size 2x!!!!!!!!), an avocado slicer, a necklace, a cat paint by number, an Amazon gift card, earrings, and a DVD and books from my bestie.

I haven’t lost weight since the day before Thanksgiving, but I haven’t gained either. I finally managed to get rid of that weird weight gain I had as a result of taking my birth control weight and now I only weigh .2 pounds more than my lowest weight. That .2 pounds could very well be bloating from my period or the fact that I ate really late last night, so I’m not worried about it. Just glad the scale is finally going down. I’m surprised and happy that I didn’t gain anything, because I was very bad over Christmas. Between the baking and eating at my sister’s house, and the cakes and cookies we’ve had at home… yeah. Very happy there was no weight gain.

I have one New Year’s resolution:

Lose 75 pounds this year. Ambitious, but I’ve already lost 50 so I know I’m capable of it. That’s about 1.5 pounds a week. I definitely need to stop having so many cheat days (one cheat meal a week when I go to lunch with my bestie should be fine, right?) and I need to exercise more. Between the four exercise DVDs I have (Jillian Michaels Six Week 6 Pack almost killed me, btw) and the ones I just found on streaming thanks to my sister pointing it out, PLUS I got running shoes (even though I can barely run), I should definitely exercise at least 4 times a week. I did Biggest Loser Power Sculpt last night and my arms hurttttt. I did it for about 25 minutes, maybe closer to half an hour. I gave up halfway through the second level because I hadn’t really eaten all day and I was starting to feel sick. I’m dumb, I know. I really love the Biggest Loser DVDs, they are meant for fatties like me so they’re not as crazy as the regular ones (Six Week 6 Pack, I’m looking at you).

So my website host claims that a bunch of my files were corrupted with malware, which makes no sense because I’m the only one with access to anything and I barely touch anything, but whatevs. I ended up reinstalling WordPress and hopefully that is the last I hear from them about it. I completely screwed up my last WordPress theme, which makes me sad because I really liked it, but it was probably time for something new. I do want to make some tweaks to this one, but that’s how I broke the last one, so… guess it will stay this way for now. I also have no idea where the picture went from the last post, so you’ll just have to live without it. I did update pictures on my About Me page, so go check that out. I’m so cute and squishy.

I’ve been up for about four hours and haven’t even brushed my teeth or gotten out of my bathrobe, so I should probably take of that. Byeee!

FIFTY!!!11

FIFTY POUNDS! I survived BSF weekend (where I’m pretty sure I ate an entire bag of goldfish crackers all by myself) and managed to finally lose 50 pounds. I’m not really sure how but I have weighed 3 pounds heavier ever since Thursday (today being the exception, the scale only said I was 2 pounds heavier than my lowest weight). I haven’t had a cheat day since BSF weekend. Not even Thanksgiving! I think it was a mix of me eating really late on Thanksgiving (I scarfed down dinner at like midnight since I was at work all day) and Walgreens screwing up my birth control prescription (AGAIN) so I ended up taking it a few days late. Good thing I don’t take it for the actual intended purpose? I don’t know why I ever stopped taking the pill for the few years I went off it. I take it to skip periods but it makes my periods lighter, I have less cramps, my boobs don’t hurt, and my skin (on my back, gross, I know) clears up.

ANYWAY, BSF weekend was fun. Forever 21 had nothing good which was a disappointment but oh well. I did get a cute shirt for work at Nordstrom Rack. We baked sugar cookies and made a gingerbread village and decorated for Christmas. And we took pictures for Christmas. We send them to my aunt and grandma as Christmas presents. They are awesome. We are wearing matching cat sweaters in them! Here is one even though I cropped my sister out of it because I’m not sure how she feels about being on my blog (where she can be viewed by hundreds of Russians because they are the only ones who ever come here):

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Yes, I’m wearing a cat sweater and also holding a cat. Whenever I see this picture I sing the song “The Coolest Girl” from A Very Potter Sequel in my head. If you haven’t seen it, the song is sung by Hermione, if that helps you understand at all. I’m hilarious. AND THE COOLEST GIRL IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD. Plz someone give me money so I can have surgery on my double chin.

I am freezing cold. That is all.

HI

45 pounds! I’ve been stuck there for the last two weeks because I am dumb and ate ALL TEH THINGS for my birthday. I regret nothing. Okay, that’s a lie. I regret eating like three pieces of cake in one day. My stomach did not feel good the next day. I changed my calorie allowance to 1440 yesterday. I was at 1200 and it was okay for awhile but all of a sudden it got to be way too hard. That means my weight loss goal went from 2 pounds a week to 1.5 but I’m okay with that. The extra 240 calories a day makes a big difference. I think a lot of it is mental, I don’t necessarily want to eat the calories, I just like knowing that I CAN. I get way too stressed out over what I’m going to eat or how many calories I have left, and I get too cranky with myself if I go over.

I’m also trying to exercise more. I got a couple Biggest Loser exercises DVDs on Amazon and I really like them. I usually just walk but that gets boring (and scary since I do it at night and there are kidnappers/bugs outside) and with the Biggest Loser Power Sculpt DVD I get some arm and ab work in. I have poor decision making skills so the first time I did one of the DVDs I decided not to wear shoes. BIG MISTAKE. I kept slipping and sliding and the next day my legs hurt SO bad I could barely walk. Learned my lesson and I’ve started wearing shoes.

I keep trying to tell myself that weight loss isn’t going to happen overnight and I’m only human and will have bad weeks. I used to really beat myself up on weeks that I didn’t lose any weight.

ANYWAY.

We start 4 tens at work next week! I didn’t think that would actually happen EVER. My co-worker is going out of town that week so my schedule is all sorts of fucked up (I have Monday, Friday, and Sunday off instead of Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday like I’m supposed to) but I shall survive. Next weekend is BSF weekend and we are going to see Evil Dead the Musical on Saturday night. And my sister is taking Tuesday off so we have DOUBLE BONUS BSF weekend. HOW EXCITING. I know you’re excited for my shopping recap.

I just got distracted by Reddit so I think it’s time for me to go.

35 pounds down!

I have lost 35 pounds! I try not to look at all the weight I need to lose (it’s way too much and pretty depressing) so I try to think of my weight loss goal in 5 pound increments, and when I get down to a number that ends in 5 I get pretty excited. Also, I spent a couple of days last week at my sister’s apartment and we made weight loss jars. I saw the idea on Pinterest, it’s basically two jars, one with marbles/whatever that represent the weight you have to lose, and one with the weight you’ve lost. Every time you lose a pound you move a marble over to the weight lost jar. I almost did marbles but my sister suggested pompoms instead. And for some reason I got it into my head that I needed almost 300 pompoms? I don’t know how that happened. Anyway, she had the jars and it cost me $2 for the pompoms and $2 for the stickers to decorate the jars (let’s pretend I only bought two bags of pompoms instead of four because I am dumb). Here is a picture:

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Yes, I decorated them like I am a 9 year old girl. I don’t know why.

Anyway, I had a really good time with my sister. We went to Lane Bryant (nothing good on sale, boo!), Nordstrom Rack (one shirt and a sweater), Savers (nothing), Big Lots (hit the Special K jackpot, I got like 5 boxes of their cracker/popcorn chips for $2 each), Family Dollar (pompoms and stickers), Target (no good fat girl clothes but I got a lot of gum and some brownie mix), Payless (BOGO half off, so two pairs of flats for work, one nude and one blue), Salvation Army (nothing, boooo! They got rid of like half their books), the used bookstore at the library (couple of books, including one Stephen King book I seem to be missing), and Forever 21. Forever 21 is probably my new favourite store, okay? I had no idea they had plus-size clothes and I ACTUALLY FIT IN THEM. The biggest size, of course, but I’m positive there’s no way I could have fit into them 30 pounds ago. I got a sweatshirt with a cat face on it, a pair of cat earrings, and four pairs of earrings that look like flowers. I’m amazed that the earrings haven’t caused an allergic reaction or fallen apart yet. The stuff there is SO cheap. The sweatshirt was $20 and the earrings were $2.80 a pair. We baked brownies and went to see The Wizard of Oz and The Producers. We also caught up on Sons of Anarchy because we watched the first episode of season 5 and since I never finished season 3, I was pretty confused. We watched half of season 3 while I was there and I finished the rest up yesterday. Now I’m 2 or 3 episodes into season 4. I love that show. I am really excited for the Fifty Shades of Grey movie because I love me some Charlie Hunnam.

I am currently waiting for the iOS 7 download to finish. I lead a very exciting life.

beep boop.

Things that are good:

1. I have lost 30 pounds! Zomg! Either I hit a plateau or I had a few shitty weeks because it took me like three weeks to lose one pound. I was getting annoyed and really buckled down and now the weight is coming off again. Also, I usually don’t worry about counting calories on my days off but yesterday I ended up only going over by 200 calories, which really isn’t too bad. Today, not so good, but wayyyy better than usual.
2. I went to the dentist today and didn’t have any cavities. I do need a crown on one of my teeth where I had a porcelain onlay put on, but I sort of expected that. The last dentist I went to did such a crappy job, I want to punch them in the face. This dentist seems a lot better so far. Also they gave me a pink toothbrush.
3. I went to Target last week and had to check out the clearance clothing like I always do. Got two sweaters for $18 each. I had actually considered buying one when they were full price, so it was nice to get them cheaper. I didn’t have a chance to try them on when I bought them, then second guessed my purchases when I tried them on, then said fuck it and wore them anyway and now I looooove them.
4. Some of my coworkers know I’m trying to lose weight, some don’t. One of them ones who didn’t know asked if I was losing weight. She’s the first person to notice that wasn’t aware I was dieting! SO EXCITED.

Things that are bad:
1. Giving pills to cats is a HUGE pain in the ass. My cat Five (cat five, get it? HAR HAR) is on two antibiotics (one for his sneezing, one for his GI inflammation) and a steroid. He HATES the metronidazole and sometimes it takes me like five tries to get it down his throat. He hates the bitter taste and if I don’t get him to swallow it on the first try, he runs away gagging and drooling. The first night I gave him the pills I tried to wipe the drool off he freaked out and scratched the shit out of my arm. Sigh. Cats.
2. I hate my job. I fantasize about rage quitting and walking out and never having to go back. The solution would be to stick it out while looking for a new job, but that’s where my paralyzing anxiety comes in. It’s so fun to be me!

This whole weight loss thing has been pretty big for me and I am really glad it is giving me something to focus on. I’ve noticed that if I don’t have some sort of goal to work toward, I get really cranky/depressed. Not that dieting is fun or anything, it’s kind of shitty actually, I miss food, but it feels reallllly good to step on the scale and see the numbers go down.

I’m gonna go shower and brush my teeth with this sample of Crest Sensitive Pro-Relief the dentist gave me. I’ve been having sensitivity lately and he thinks it’s because of the super awesome case of eustachian tube dysfunction I have. Did I mention I’m taking a steroid nasal spray for that? I AM SO SEXY, OMG.

SOON I SHALL BE HOT AND SKINNY.

I have lost a total of 25 pounds so far. I AM SUPER PSYCHED. I took pictures of myself when I first started dieting so I can see my progress. I took one back picture, one front picture, and one profile picture (of me in my undies so they definitely will not be posted here, haha) and I can already see a difference. Nothing huge, but my stomach is definitely smaller. I can’t wear my rings anymore because they are too big (I could probably get away with wearing them for awhile longer but if I swing my arms hard enough they will go flying, and I like my rings and don’t want to lose them) and I wore a pair of pants on the weekend I spent at my sister’s and I kept having to hike them up because they were too big.

How did people diet before the Internet was invented? If I didn’t have apps to help keep track of my calories and exercise, I wouldn’t be able to do this. MyFitnessPal and RunKeeper, I love you. I will admit that MFP is not the most accurate when it comes to calories sometimes, but I love the social aspect of it so I keep using it.

I forgot everything else I intended to write about, so I’ll just go and watch The Hobbit now.

Things that are good:

1. I have lost 20 POUNDS. I usually give myself like three cheat days a week (a lot, I know, but somehow it’s working for me) but only gave myself two this week, and on one of those days I didn’t end up eating a whole lot because I didn’t feel great. So yay me! I don’t have a goal and I honestly try not to think about how far I have to go, it’s way too depressing. I just give myself 5 pound goals and I figure every 20 I’ll buy myself something cool as a reward. Nothing expensive, just some lipgloss or something.
2. I’ve had my eye on a sweater at Lane Bryant for about a month now and it just went on sale for $12.99 marked down from $70. They didn’t have it in the size I want (which is a size smaller than I usually wear, their sweaters are kind of on the big side) so I got it in a size bigger but I’m hoping it should be okay. It’s super cute.
3. My job sucks less now. Still sucks, but at least I’m not an anxious mess like I was two weeks ago. One of my co-workers is out on FMLA so I get to open two days a week! Getting up at 6 to be at work at 7:30 super sucks but I get out at 3:30 and that is cool.
4. Got my 3DS and am completely addicted to Animal Crossing. A Facebook friend let me raid her town for fruit and in a few days I should have a bunch more to plant and sell.
5. I get four days off in a row soon! Going to see my sister for the weekend, yay!

Things that are bad:

1. I have yet to be paid the raise I was supposed to be given when I got promoted. I let my boss and HR know but I predict that trying to get the back pay I’m owed will be a huge pain in the ass.
2. I went to urgent care on Monday because my ear was bothering me and it was getting to be too uncomfortable for me to deal with. It felt plugged and just generally uncomfortable for about a month. The doctor said I have congestion in both ears and gave me antibiotics, Mucinex, and prednisone. Prednisone tastes like SHIT, seriously.
3. Also, Walgreens pharmacy is generally terrible. Twice they’ve tried to bill me full price for prescriptions that were covered under my insurance. Easy fix but it annoys me. Then every time I go there’s some pain in the ass at the counter who is having insurance trouble and spends like 15 minutes talking to the pharmacist. I am impatient, did I tell you that? TRUE STORY. Walgreens new loyalty card is pretty awesome, though. I got a delicious candy bar (FOR MY CHEAT DAY) and with the card it was like 50 cents, plus it was on closeout already. It was yummy, I have no regrets.
4. I accidentally fell asleep earlier and woke up super hot and sweaty. 🙁

I am b-o-r-i-n-g. Wish my ear would feel better soon….

blah.

Things that have happened lately:

1. I lost 15 pounds. That’s pretty cool.
2. I got hit on twice on Monday. Neither of the guys are anyone I’m interested in but it’s nice to know some men find me attractive.
3. I applied to UNLV. I should have waited because I still need to raise my GPA and I don’t know what to major in, but sometimes I do things without thinking. At least applying to college is better than doing something crazy?
4. I bought a Nintendo DS. I had one a few years ago and felt like I wasn’t playing it enough so I sold it on Amazon. I keep seeing posts about Animal Crossing on Reddit and it made me miss playing it, so I bought a pink Nintendo 3DS XL tonight, along with Animal Crossing. I’m not crazy about the fact that I just spent like $240 on a video game system but whatever, I just got a promotion, I deserve a present, RIGHT?!
5. I went to Target on Monday and bought a sweater for $8.
6. I just switched purses and realized I carry around a lot of crap. I had, like, seven pens from work and four packs of gum. I am always misplacing pens at work and whenever I go to the cage at night I grab one and stick it in my purse because I know I’ll need it later.
7. I am addicted to Reddit.

You know what I need to work on? Whenever people annoy me I just want them out of my face. I get super pissed off and irritated and it’s easier for me to give in to whatever they want so they leave me the fuck alone. I NEED TO STOP THIS.

SIGH. Off to bed.