Hi friends!!!1

I AM STILL ALIVE. I just have nothing of interest to write!!

Last time I posted I wrote about how I was transferring to a different property. It turned out to be a really good decision for a couple of reasons. One, I am no longer surrounded by terrible people. My coworkers at the last property were just awful, selfish people. I like the majority of my coworkers now. Two, I work the day shift. This is a miracle because people basically have to die in order for someone to get the day shift in the casino industry. When I started at the new property, the guy ahead of me in seniority for some reason did not want the day shift. Then he quit so I was first in seniority for my job classification which guaranteed it for me (if he stuck around he could have switched to days if he wanted). Three, it’s a bigger, nicer property. I no longer work in a dirt-filled cave! That’s what the old property felt like, okay?! Also good is that the manager that hired me at the new property left after a few months and my old boss (who I really get along with) transferred to where I am now.

So that’s good. Also good is that I started taking medication for the panic disorder I developed last year. I was basically living my life living in fear of having another panic attack, which is really no way to live at all. I was miserable. I had my worst panic attack I’ve ever had a few days after Christmas and was finally like, okay, I need help. I saw a new doctor (since my old one left and no one told me) and she prescribed me Celexa. It took a few weeks to start working so I had a few panic attacks and really bad anxiety days until it kicked in, but now I feel pretty good. It has pretty minimal side effects – the frequent urination seems to have stopped unless I drink Starbucks iced coffee and I can deal with the excessive yawning. The only thing I don’t like is that it makes me grind my teeth bad at night. Even with a night guard I wake up and can barely open my mouth until an hour or so later.

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Five
2001 – 2016

🙁 Poor guy developed congestive heart failure. He was having a hard time breathing one night so I took him to the emergency vet, where he stayed overnight. He was okay for a week until I took him to the cardiologist, where I found out that he was developing blood clots. He was having a hard time breathing when I got him home and I knew it was time to say goodbye, especially with the blood clots. I miss him a lot. I had him cremated and put some of his ashes in a heart charm that I wear sometimes. Munch, his bff, didn’t know what to do with himself for awhile, but he’s doing better. I’m getting teary-eyed so I’ll stop talking now.

Anyway, overall, life is better when you’re no longer having panic attacks about absolutely nothing.

I’m alive!

I’m alive! Things have been a little crazy for the last couple months, that’s all. I started a different program at a different school (went from a BA psychology program at a four year university to a 1 year certificate program at a community college) and am starting a new job next week. Well, not NEW job, more like the same exact job but at a different property for better hours and slightly more money. The manager of the other property’s sports book emailed me before the job was even posted and said I had done a good job for him in the past (he worked at my current property for a few months a couple years ago) and if I would consider transferring to his property. My first question was what the shift was, because I really don’t want to work til 2-3 am during football season. He said it would be days, and it’s four ten hour shifts like I currently work (or did work until someone went on FMLA), so I was like, YES, PLEASE.

I also had two deaths in the family, one week apart. My aunt died unexpectedly and then my grandma a week later. My sister and dad flew to NY to take care of all that while I stayed home and took care of the house. I took some bereavement time off last weekend so I could go through my grandma’s jewelry and stuff my sister brought back with her. My sister let me have my grandma’s opal ring, which I really appreciate. Opals always reminded me of my grandma and now I have the ring she always wore.

My sister also brought back Esther:

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SHE IS SO CREEPY. My sister found her in the attic and I can only imagine how scary that was when it happened. She also brought back my grandpa’s Mason stuff, which was really cool to look at. We love old stuff. Even Esther, even though I swore she moved on her own when I first saw her.

I must go shower since I am going out with my man friend tonight. It’s my turn to pick what to do and I haven’t decided yet. I’m thinking sushi (I’m having a craving) and maybe some Netflix/Redbox. I’m boring and I DON’T EVEN CARE.

Snow!

Just checked the weather and the forecast says it might snow tonight! Looks like I will have to put on a pair of leggings under my jeans for my walk to the bus stop tomorrow. It’s only about 15ish minutes away but man it is miserable when it is cold and windy. Good thing I found a cute purple pea coat in the garage (it belonged to my sister at one point, no idea how it ended up in the garage) and got it dry cleaned. I also got a really cute purple and pink Betsey Johnson scarf for Christmas. I should really invest in a hat or earmuffs or something for when it gets really cold and windy out. Too bad I’m really not a hat person.

My sister got me nearly every cat t-shirt she could find at Walmart for Christmas so I’ve been wearing those with the old man sweater I got at Savers. It’s Avenue brand and suuuuuper soft and cute. Totally old man, though. Plus I got a pair of cat sneakers and bought some cat socks on eBay… man, I’m so cool.

It is hard to type because my right hand is really, really cold. I really need to turn the electric blanket on and get into bed and watch Sons of Anarchy. I love that show so much and I am so sad that it’s over so I am rewatching it.

I think after next semester I don’t qualify for financial aid since I have so many credits. I guess that’s what I get for fucking around while I was getting my associate degree? I wish I knew what I wanted to do. I am seriously rethinking this psychology thing, a bachelor’s degree in psychology is fairly useless (which I suspected but a class I took last semester just confirmed it) and even though I really want a BA just for me, it seems dumb to spend like 10k on something that I can’t even use (despite the fact that a BA is a BA). I don’t know. I am taking an Excel class that starts in January. Work is paying for that. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE. PLEASE ADVISE. I hate my job and I hate the fact that I don’t know what the hell I want to do with my life and it takes a lot of energy not to throw myself on the floor constantly in fits of despair.

Now I’m sad and have nothing else to say. 🙁

I am full of rage.

You know what really makes me mad? People think that obsessive-compulsive disorder is merely the compulsion to have everything a certain way. THAT IS NOT HOW IT WORKS. The next time one of my co-workers giggles and goes “I am so OCD!” they are gonna get a punch in the mouth. This Reddit comment sums it up better than I ever could:

“No, having your highlighters in order of the color of the rainbow is not OCD. No making sure your tissue box facing is aligned with the corner of your desk is not OCD.

Flicking a light switch on and off for 20 minutes until it flicks off “correctly”, because you think if you don’t flick it off “correctly” your whole family will die and there’s nothing you can do to prevent yourself from giving in to these compulsions…

Yes, thats OCD.”

I’m taking an abnormal psychology class and this week’s chapter is on personality disorders. We have to post weekly on a discussion board and this week’s question was “When might a personality disorder be an advantage to a person or vocation?” I wrote about how people with narcissistic personality disorder tend to be in leadership and management positions, and I backed that up with a link to an article about an actual study done on this. My classmates? “Well, people with OCD like to be really organized so they would make good accountants! Or cleaners!”

Oh. MY. GOD. Seriously. I want to throw myself on the floor in a fit of despair. I want to throw an epic hissy fit. One of them was even like “I have OCD tendencies (which I diagnosed myself!) because I like to make lists!”

KILL ME. RIGHT. NOW.

On the bright side, I feel really good about myself because their dumb, vague, WRONG comments make me feel super smart.

SIGH.

In other news, two of my co-workers called in sick last night so I worked a 12 hour shift. That is not a fun thing to do. I work 10 hours normally and when it gets to be around hour 7 I’m like “THREE MORE HOURS STILL? REALLY?!” so you can imagine how tacking on another 2 hours made me feel. Oh well. I do enjoy getting the overtime on my paycheck because that means more money, which means more vintage jewelry from eBay! Gosh. I am just so cool.

Did I ever mention I collect vintage books? I just really like old stuff, I don’t know what that is all about. Anyway, my oldest book WAS 1900, but then I found a book at some random thrift store the other day. Now my oldest book is from 1890! How cool is that? It’s a Lutheran hymnal and it’s all in German. It’s in terrible shape (binding is falling apart and it has a burn mark on it) but I was excited to beat my oldest book record for a mere $2. My vintage book collection has also expanded way too much so I’ve had to change my standards from “ANY OLD BOOK!” to “interesting old books.” Like, I got a weird old book titled “The Schooling of the Western Horse.” That’s pretty interesting and odd. My man friend found me a vintage veterinary book at Savers last time we went so of course I had to get that one. I really need to organize my bookshelves. And get rid of some and donate them to the bookshelf at work to make up for all the Phillipa Gregory paperbacks I snag from there.

I REALLY need to do some Christmas shopping. My sister is easy to shop for because I know what she likes, but my mom and dad… bleh. My mom wants some clothes from Woman Within, so I’ll do that, but my dad? I DO NOT KNOW.

You know what I love? Candles from Bath and Body Works. They smell stronger and better than any other candle in the WORLD. IN THE WHOLE WORLD.

Before I go, check out my adorable little Lexi curled up in my arms.
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SO CUTE I CAN’T EVEN

FOREVER.

It has been FOREVER. I’ve been a busy little bee! Jk, I do nothing all day. Okay, that’s sort of a lie. I’ve been doing homework (had an 8 page literature review due last week for my Psych 201 class) and hanging out with my man friend. I refer to him as my man friend because I am hesitant to use the word boyfriend and he’s more than a friend, so… it’s either that or the old-fashioned gentleman caller. I’m like 100 years old so I should just give in and say gentleman caller. Did I ever mention I started collecting vintage brooches? Just to cement how old I am. Vintage brooches and cat statues… and the vintage brooches have given way to vintage jewelry of any kind. Necklaces, bracelets, cocktail rings… throw in the occasional super tacky knockoff Betsey Johnson charm bracelet from eBay… I’m basically the coolest. What can I say? I’ve been inspired by Mad Man. I rewatched the entire series (well, up until whatever season is currently on TV) last month. Now I’m trying to catch up on New Girl (Winston and the cat, OH LAWD, SO FUNNY) and How I Met Your Mother. Also trying to keep up with Sons of Anarchy and American Horror Story. Isn’t Dandy the scariest character on AHS? Even scarier than the clown!

I currently hate my job and am willing to take a pay cut to leave that hellhole. Sadly I’ve interviewed for 3 jobs (one was for HR and I realllllly wanted that one) and gotten none of them so I am feeling really discouraged. It’s not like I’m applying for jobs that are beyond my skills. The HR job was basically filing/answering questions at the front desk and I didn’t even get that. Feeling like I’m going to be stuck at my current shithole job is really depressing me. That and the fact that I’m 99.9% sure I have borderline personality disorder… ugh. JUST KILL ME. This is a good description of BPD if you’re interested in what it’s like to be in my head 24/7. Hint: IT IS GENERALLY TERRIBLE. I know I should see a doctor (my bestie is encouraging me to see his doctor because he thinks she will be more helpful than the ones I’ve seen already) but then I’ll just cry in front of the doctor and if there’s one thing I really hate it’s crying in front of other people… I mean, I hate a lot of things but I REALLY hate crying in front of people. If I ever cry in front of you it’s because I feel super comfortable with you and you should feel really proud.

So… that’s my life. I’m only taking two classes next semester even though I told myself I would take 3 each semester so I can graduate in a reasonable amount of time. It still is 7 credits of classes, which is half time, and I want to take an Excel class next semester and have work pay for it. I’ve been putting off doing my tuition reimbursement paperwork because me taking an Excel class is sort of… well, let’s just say even though I use Excel every day at work, it’s not like I do much more than inputting numbers in like, 5 spots. I really want to take it, though… one of the interviews had me do an Excel test and I didn’t do that great. Of course, I could have done worse, but taking an Excel class (a free one!) can only help me.

My bestie got me the Sims 4 for my birthday, so I’m going to go play that. Oh! Yes, it was my birthday. I am 30 now. SO. OLD. And I basically am terrible at life, I feel like I should have figured everything out by now. Or at least be on the right track instead of being at a shitty job I hate where I have to deal with the stupidest people I’ve ever met in my life (coworkers AND guests). Ugh, don’t let me get started. Anyway, I had a nice birthday. My sister made me a really cute wallet out of Star Wars fabric. She also got me the cutest hardcover copy of Little Women which is one of my favourite books. Apparently Puffin redid some of the covers of classic books (Little Women, Heidi, etc) and they are ADORABLE. My man friend got me everything I love (which means he does listen to me even if I think he doesn’t), which included a pumpkin candle, a little plush Grumpycat, a Grumpycat cup for work, and. birthday cake lipgloss.

OKAY OKAY TIME FOR SIMS 4 INSTEAD OF DOING SCHOOLWORK BECAUSE THAT’S HOW I ROLL.

My super cool collection

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Vintage planter I got in Boulder City. My sister added the aloe plant for me.

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Left, Williams Sonoma candle. Right, tea light holder I got in Utah.

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Antique store in Boulder City.

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The big white cat with the smaller white cat is a sugar bowl. The cat to the right I picked up an antique store in Boulder City. It didn’t have a price tag so the guy sold it to me for $4. IT COULD BE WORTH MILLIONS FOR ALL I KNOW. I like it because it looks like its rolling its eyes. 😀 Wooden cats were a gift from my sister. Also pictures: my erotic statues from Chinatown in San Francisco.

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The cats with bows are salt and pepper shakers.

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Cream pitcher and random lucky cats.

HELLO!!!!1

I AM ALIVE! It’s been awhile since I posted. I HAVE BEEN A BUSY WOMAN. Okay, not really. I spent a lot of the last few months watching Netflix and reading books.

Guess what tomorrow is?! THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. Yes, I, Kristin, the coolest girl in the whole wide world, have enrolled in a university in order to get my BA. SO EXCITING. I did some research on schools that had online degrees with low tuition and I found one in Kansas. I am now a student at Fort Hays State University!! It feels so nice to have finally made a decision, even if I still question it each and every day.

What is my major, you ask? PSYCHOLOGY. What am I going to do with that degree? NO IDEA. I’ve actually looked into grad school just to see if it is even a possibility. I just really want to get my bachelors degree and the only way I’ll finish is if I study something I love. And you know what I love? PSYCHOLOGY. You know what I hate even though I think I should major in it? BUSINESS ADMINISTRATION. Oh well.

I actually finished one of the assignments for my abnormal psychology class already. I’m pretty gung-ho about this whole thing.

So. Busy busy. I interviewed for a new job on Wednesday and I’m not sure I’m going to accept the position if I’m offered. It’s in a whole different department, which would be nice, and it’s a clerical sort of job which I think I would be really good at, but it is a paycut. And also at the interview the financial controller I was interviewing with said I would have to travel to other properties to help with inventory (the job is for an inventory control clerk) and since I don’t drive I would not be able to do that. I sent him an email withdrawing my application and thanking him for taking the time to interview me and explained that I don’t drive and wouldn’t be able to fulfill the travel requirements of the job. He emailed back saying there was no travel so I was like wtf? BUT YOU SAID I WOULD HAVE TO GO TO OTHER PROPERTIES ONCE A MONTH. He hasn’t emailed me back yet, probably since that was the weekend. I desperately want out of the sports book but taking a $2 paycut seems really stupid. I DON’T KNOW. I’m getting all anxious just typing about it. Did you know my face turns red and hot right before I have a panic attack? THAT’S WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW. I WILL CONTINUE TO TYPE IN ORDER TO DISTRACT MYSELF.

You know what else makes my face turn red and hot? Being hit on. The cute security guard I flirt with at work got all close to me the other day and I got all red afterwards my coworker was like “hey, you know what your face looks like?” as he held up a red marker. UGH. There’s actually a surgery for excessive facial blushing but after googling it it seems like a really terrible idea. Because, you know, DEATH AND ALL THAT. It would be nice not to get all red whenever I’m upset or embarrassed or being hit on.

I have become the sort of person that collects cat figurines. Yes. Yes. SO SAD. I went to Boulder City for the first time last weekend (it’s only like 15 minutes away from my sister’s house and we went because we love antique and thrift stores) and got a whole bunch of cat statues and figurines and planters at the antique stores there. Then the last time I went to Utah I got a set of cat kitchen things (sugar bowl, salt and pepper shaker, cream pitcher) and a siamese cat figurine. I should take pictures of my awesome collection. I’ve also started making lavender sachets. I’ve loved lavender ever since I was young (which was like 399393 years ago because I’m going to turn 30 soon, FYI) and everything in this house smells like gross cigarettes so I’ve become slightly obsessed with air fresheners and lavender and candles. I got a wax warmer and wax tarts and I have an air freshener in every one of my rooms.

SPEAKING OF MY ROOMS, my sister came over one day and helped me clean out her old bedroom, the room I sometimes refer to as the library. It was half library half… well, let’s just say the library was the place I put things when I didn’t want to deal with them. So she came over and helped me clean and now it is my library and office. Pretty handy since school starts tomorrow and now I have room to put my textbooks. Plus half the table I use as a desk is in front of the window so I put a cat bed there and Five looooves to lay in it and sunbathe. Too bad I discovered one of the cats was peeing against one of my bookshelves so I had to get rid of the shelf and it still smells like cat pee in that spot. So now the room smells like Glade plugin, cat pee, blackberry plum wax tart, and Target fabric refresher spray (which I do not recommend as it is not nearly as good as Febreze, but at least it smells better than cat pee).

Seriously, I can’t stress how obsessed I am with nice-smelling things right now. The Glade plugins don’t last nearly as long as Bath and Body Works Wallflowers, though. I feel dumb for buying so many Wallflowers because they are sort of pricey, but they seem to be worth it compared to the Glade plugins. Sooo many nice smells, except for the one I just had in my bedroom that ended up spelling like men’s cologne. It was still nearly full and I hate to waste things so I put it in the bathroom. I also bought a bunch of candles. Eucalyptus Mint, Heirloom Pumpkin (for fall, which is slowly creeping up on us), FRENCH LAVENDER OMG YUM, and Watermelon Lemonade. Plus Bath and Body Works sent me an email today and was like “hey, here’s $10 off AND free shipping, BUY SOME STUFF” and I was like “OKAY FINE” and got some new Wallflowers for fall. Vanilla Chai, Pumpkin Cupcakes, mmmm.

I should go and take pictures of my cat statues so you can all see how awesome (and by awesome I mean pathetic) I am.

I’m alive!

I’m alive! For now, anyway. My allergies are sort of killing me right now. I thought I had strep throat because my throat hurt THAT bad, but the urgent care doctor (who was kind of a jerk and said it didn’t look like my throat hurt) said it was an upper respiratory infection/cold/whatever. I called in sick last Saturday so I could get better before vacation, and it sort of worked. My sore throat/earache went away and was replaced with the ITCHIEST THROAT EVER and the terrible cough that accompanies that. I actually coughed so hard the other day I threw up in the sink. Now I have the itchy throat and cough and face pain because of sinus pressure. And of course my nose is a little sniffley, but then again it always is.

SO! I went to Disneyland and California Adventure last week. I hadn’t been in forever and it was pretty fun. The first day we went to Disneyland and it was pretty good at first, but then it got really hot and crowded and by the time 3pm came I was just done. California Adventure was way more fun, I ended up wearing yoga pants instead of jeans (despite swearing I would never wear them in public EVER) and that definitely helped with the heat. Plus the rides were a lot more fun, in my opinion. It was a lot less crowded too. Between FastPass, single rider lines, and my dad’s handicap pass, we only waited like, 15 minutes max on a single ride. I LOVED Tower of Terror. The best part was I knew what the ride was like, but I didn’t think the drop came when it did. If there was a camera on my face when it happened you would probably pee yourself laughing at the picture. We went on it once and immediately got back on. Rode that three times, California Screamin’ three times, the Goofy rollercoaster twice, and the Cars ride twice. Plus a couple of the other ones but the first two were definitely the most fun.

Work has started a weight loss contest. FOR MONEY. Last time the prizes were gift cards and random shit (I once got a silicone baking pan if that’s any indication of how shitty the prizes can be) but now it’s for COLD HARD CASH. I asked today at the weigh in and the HR lady said the pots were at least $500, so that definitely motivated me. I definitely need to get back on track with the weight loss, I think I’ve gained a couple of pounds back. Not TOO many (I think about 5) but I definitely needed something to jump start my motivation again. Money works for me. Also, I’m more competitive than I think. I always say “oh I’m not really a competitive person” but then faced with a competition I’m all “I’M GONNA KICK YER ASS”. Depends on the competition, really. I know I’m capable of some serious weight loss so that helps. I think having lost the 60 pounds definitely helped me at Disneyland last week. Between wearing good shoes and having lost the weight, my feet barely hurt at all and I had no trouble with rides.

I’m pretty proud of myself for being really serious about wearing sunscreen last week. I’m the type of person that puts some on and then is like “oh I’ll be fine for the next six hours of blistering, burning sunlight” and then when I get burned I’m like “…stupid.” I should have applied some more at the end of the day because I did get a little red on my chest when we sat and watched the parade at California Adventure, but nothing too bad. It didn’t hurt at all, anyway. Honestly, I was way better than I usually am. Now if only the kind I used on my face didn’t make me break out… I got the Sephora sun skincare kit and it came with 393934934 samples of sunscreen so I’m hoping to find one that I like. I’m almost 30 and I should’ve started taking better care of my skin a long time ago. I AM SO OLD.

I REALLY don’t want to go back to work on Wednesday. After having the last 11 days off, I am absolutely dreading it. I mean, I usually dread it anyway but now I’m REALLY dreading it. I really want to quit but I don’t have another job lined up, plus I’m taking some classes that work is paying for and if I quit now they won’t reimburse me for them. It says I have to stay there for a year afterward or I have to pay them back but would they really take the money? I work for a shitty company so I would not be shocked if they didn’t even realize it.

Also going out of town this weekend. Well, Monday. It’s ultimate BSF road trip weekend! We have a show on Saturday night (50 Shades! The Musical), one on Monday night in Utah (The Little Mermaid), and then back to Vegas for Book of Mormon. I’m pretty excited.

I took a three hour nap and I’m still tired. I love naps but hate how groggy they make me.

…yep. That’s about it.

Hi, I’m nuts.

I’ve been sort of a crazy person lately. I’ve been having panic attacks over stupid work related stuff. I’m having problems with my lady parts (TMI, I know) and that’s stressing me out because I don’t feel any better and I’m on day 5 of antibiotics. Plus the antibiotics make me feel super shitty and nauseous unless I eat yogurt before taking them. And it took me 4 days to figure that out, including one day of calling in sick at work because I felt so crappy. I was applying mascara and all of a sudden I felt super nauseous and shaky and sweaty but cold and I had to go dry heave over the toilet a few times. I went right back to bed and called in. Super weird and kind of scary.

The nausea from the antibiotics allowed me to lose like 2.5 pounds in a week, so that’s good, I guess. I can see my collarbones now. You have to realllly look for them to be able to see, but they’re there. I’m pretty excited about it.

I’m tired. My weekend is almost over and I am not looking forward to going back to work. I’ve been applying for other jobs because I decided I need to stop letting anxiety run my life. Did that make sense? Probably not. I’m trying to take little steps out of my comfort zone even if applying for other jobs is it. Something like that is probably not a big deal to most people but hi, I am crazy and everything scares me. I don’t drive because it scares me. I live at home because what if I move out and someone breaks in and the cats get out? Or they hurt the cats? Or I’m kidnapped and tortured and murdered by a serial killer? Or someone in the next apartment sets their stove on fire and then my cats die in a fiery blaze? I don’t usually look for other jobs because what if I apply for one and they call me for an interview and I have to work that day, then I have to figure out if I can go to work late or if I should just wait until my next day off. Then what if I get a new job and it sucks and I have panic attacks? I basically live my whole life avoiding panic attacks.

Other things I’ve been trying to do to get out of my comfort zone include 1) cutting my hair and 2) buying clothes that I am generally not used to wearing. I decided I needed something new and cutting my hair is the easiest way to achieve that. I showed the lady a picture of Natalie Portman with cute layered hair and I guess that’s sort of what I got. I definitely got a whole lot of length cut off. It’s too short to put in a bun now which is weird to me because I love buns. Oh well. It’s just hair, it grows back, right? I don’t hate it, anyway. I also bought a maxi skirt and some infinity scarves. Yes, I know, girls wear those things every day but me? I am a jeans and v-neck t-shirt kind of girl. I am so not a maxi skirt, infinity scarf wearing sort of girl. But I am trying to be, I guess?

SIGH. BIG OLD SIGH.

I am bored.

Spent the weekend at my sister’s place this weekend. Just got home today after a mani pedi and some delicious Chinese food for lunch. She had to go to work for a few hours today so I wandered around downtown. By wandered I mean I sat at Dunkin Donuts for awhile and had an apple fritter and iced coffee, then went to the Beef Jerky Store. It has more than Beef Jerky, FYI. I got some dried kiwi and some brownie brittle, which turned out to be like… brownie cookies. Or something.

I got some good stuff this weekend, including a pair of jeans (in size 20!!!) for $4 at the thrift store, a Jillian Michaels DVD for $3 at Big Lots, and this book:

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It’s from 1970 and cost me $1. Worth every penny and if you don’t believe me, you will after you read this excerpt:

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Haven’t lost any weight and I am okay with that. As long as I don’t gain I am satisfied. I had a hard time for a few weeks straight but hopefully tomorrow I can get back on track with my 1200 a day diet. I fit into women’s XXL now (that’s women’s regular!!!) and my sister gave me a huge box of clothes she didn’t want anymore, so my closet is filled with new-to-me clothes that I got for freeeeee.

My gentleman friend is out of town but will be back in a few days and hopefully I get to see him, yay! Our work schedules do not match up at all so sometimes it is hard to get together.

I think I might go take a nap. I love naps.